Journey to Motherhood!!!

Written on May 11, 2005

Motherhood! Oh yes. This word has been repeatedly if not redundantly described and used. But really, you'll never know for sure what it means till you become a mom.
I was once the life of the party. And I still am from time to time. I've worked with the most talented and skillful working class in the restaurant business, and have brushed shoulders with the high society crowd (them being the guests in the restaurants I've worked at). And I did have the time of my life. And it was exhilarating. Time flies so fast. When youre young and single, you are as carefree as a butterfly. Until someone snatches you out to reality.
Four years ago, I met a young Finnish guy who was working at a global telecommunications company in Manila. I was managing an Irish pub and he was a regular guest. Little did I know that apart from the Guiness beer our pub serves, he actually comes to see me. It didnt take me long to realize that Toni is quite a nice guy. More than kind compared to average Pinoy. No insecurities, and a lil less jealousy.
We soon began dating and eventually lived together in an apartment in the city center. Being a Filipina and raised as a Catholic, I know my parents will disagree big time to my living with a guy whom I am not married to, and, a foreigner. I had to buy some time. I made an appointment for my dad and Toni to meet at the pub just to ease him in. And so they did. I have to get my dad on my side first, because I know my mom will be the difficult part of the journey. Several weeks after, I arranged a swimming picnic with my dad, my mom, my grandma, my bestfriend, Toni and me. I still dont know how my mom would react to it, so I didnt tell them yet that we are living together.
A year and a half past, and Toni realized his passion for building guitar. So he went back to Finland and applied for a guitar building course. Although I want him to pursue his passion, the lil devil inside me hoped that he will not get in the school. But of course he did, and we started packing our stuff. Went through all the issues of obtaining visa and tickets, travel insurance and so on and so forth. A month before our departure, we stayed in Boracay. First, the rent was cheaper than the condo unit back in Makati, the air is fresher, food is great, beach everyday. We needed to do some detox of the hurried life, pollution, and plain stresses by the city.
December 5th, 2002, I told Toni I dont want to smoke anymore. I gave him my last pack and asked him to finish it if he wants. Next day, I started feeling nauseous. And I felt bloated. I called up Dr. Girlie and asked for a preggy kit. Toni went to the gym as he usually does everyday since coming to the Island. Two hours later, I dropped my liquid down the tube of the kit and it didn't take two minutes for it to turn pink. A lil bun is baking in the oven. I cannot explain how I felt that day. I am so elated, and yet reserved coz I dont know how Toni would react to it. Will he tell me to get rid of it? I had no idea. But I called him anyway. His response? "Are you sure?..... I don't know what to say. Am speechless. In a very happy way."
Second call was to my mom. All she said was, "I told you. I have been telling you that you are pregnant for the last 2 weeks."
Third call was to my bestfriend, who was in Los Angeles. I had to wake her up. I didn't care what time it was there. I just have to tell her. And she was overjoyed. Like as if shes the one having the baby. First sound that came out of her mouth is somewhat between a squeal and a laugh. I wasn't quite sure what came first.
And so the journey to motherhood begins.